The ordinary, everyday things parents do in the home are the most important predictors of a child’s success in school and in life.  The humblest activities of the day—reading with children, talking to them over the kitchen table, giving a hug—have the greatest effect on their lives.  They outweigh nearly every lesson a child will learn in school.

   This book is especially valuable for parents who grew up in a home which was less than what it should be.  It can aid all parents regardless of their status—married, single, separated, or divorced.

   The author begins by explaining there are only a few principles of successful parenting.  However, parents often can’t see how these principles apply to a variety of situations. 

Four Basic Principles of Behavior

   How your friend responds to her 7-year-old may be exactly how you should respond to your 14-year-old, but the differences in age and circumstances make that hard to understand.  Glenn Latham encourages readers to see beyond the differences to understand the common principles.

   A strength of The Power of Positive Parenting is repetition of principles, and that is what this book provides—countless learning opportunities for parents.  The more thoroughly parents understand what to do, the greater will be the benefits to the children.

   The core idea is that behavior is strengthened or weakened by consequences, and behavior ultimately responds better to positive consequences. In addition, the author illustrates how parents unwittingly reinforce the very behavior they want to discourage. 

Defining Boundaries

   From his four principles, Glenn Latham derives five basic rules for parents, and he explains how they apply to every situation from infancy to young adulthood.  Topics included are as diverse as dealing with hate and anger, tattling, tantrums, sibling rivalry, lying and stealing, substance abuse, and building self-esteem.

   Behavior analysis—the method of this book—is not a substitute for discussion with your children.  It’s a technique for handling areas where clear boundaries are needed.

From The Power of Positive Parenting:

--“The best treatment known to humankind is to respond in a positive way to appropriate behavior.”

--“Unless what you are about to say or do has a high probability of making things better, don’t say it and don’t do it.”

--“You will never beat, scream or shout your children into good behavior!”

Reservation:
Over and over authors can’t resist going off-topic, even though it undercuts what they previously said.

In Glenn Latham’s case it happens in Chapter 26.  Having explained for 355 pages the relationship between behavior and consequences, he highlights the following statement:  “The key to a happy marriage is unselfish service to one’s spouse.” (Page 358)  About what makes successful marriages, Latham says,  “…a thorough answer to that question is far beyond the scope of this book.”

He should have listened to his own words.

The remark about "unselfish service" undercuts the behavioral principles he teaches.  Stated as a proposition, it reads, if you unselfishly serve your spouse, you will have a happy marriage.  That gives permission to the abused wife to stay, and it encourages a man or woman to remain with a drunken spouse to the detriment of the children.

Inadvertently, Glenn Latham gives the absolute example why it is so hard to do what’s right.  The author can’t break free from something contrary to logic and his own line of behavioral research.